Tuesday, November 27, 2012

What Women Want?

I am twenty six years old.  I have two children and will soon have my divorce finalized.  I have never been a single adult....until now.  I had always known that regular vanilla sex had left me feeling unfulfilled. There was more I just knew it.  So when you figure out what the "more" is you want it.  You want it badly.  Then you get a taste of it.  Now you would think when one has gotten what they had strove to obtain for such a long time they would be satisfied. Like many of submissive or just kinkier people in general know there is no going back.  You have been left with the insatiable craving and need for something sexually that you must have, or it is not enough.

I was at a friend's home the other evening for dinner and drinks and he jokingly had turned the television to the science channel.  The show was the "The Science of Sex." We got a good giggle out of it at first and continued our conversation until I had heard something on the television about how women unintentionally have urges to commit infidelity during ovulation.  A woman may choose a spouse who is less dominant and has more feminine qualities: friendly, better parenting skills, and so forth (the beta). On the other hand when she is ovulating she may be drawn to a more dominant male.  She wants someone who is strong and masculine (the alpha) for the sake of making sure her children are strong for survival.  They did reiterate the fact that the woman is more than likely unaware of why she is so attracted to another person than her husband.

I was fascinated by this.  I stood there for a minute pondering my feelings and attraction for my ex-husband versus those I had for my friend.  I was not attracted to hubby physically like I am my friend.  Hubby didn't like kinky sex.  He didn't ever like to assert any sort of authority except to throw a tantrum to get his way.  He wanted to be taken care of.   As I'm assessing my friends physical attributes (who is taller, leaner, and more vibrant) I realized I was that woman they spoke about on the television program.  I had chosen a mate that made my day to day easier on a superficial level never stopping and considering if it was enough.  

I looked down at my friends hands and considered how much they turned me on.  They were bigger and masculine, a lot bigger than mine (I'm five foot ten inches, the average size of the American male, so I guess it makes me feel more feminine to be reminded that he's bigger and stronger). I wanted his hands on me, holding me down, and spanking me.  I wanted him to man handle me.  I had wanted that from hubby at one time, but I never truly believed he could be that man. He knew he was not that either.  He had joked a lot during our marriage that in my circle of friends I was the "alpha female" or "pack leader."  Alas, I was right and now I am in search of my "more masculine mate."

To your question did he put his hands on me? Spank me? Torture me into submission? Make it hurt so good? Leave me lying there completely thoughtless and sated? Well that's a story for a different time.  

I laughed so hard when I saw this.  Just sharing some humor.

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